Aix ma Ville.

I have no words. No words to explain this reality, that is the end of my study abroad. My heart is actually aching, and I am a mess (like always), but this time of so many emotions. Like last semester, I made amazing friends that made it absolutely dreadful to have to say goodbye to... However this time is different. It's almost worse. I feel homesick for this place that I haven't even left, yet. I think it was easier saying goodbye last time, because part of me knew I was coming back (in a short time). With out a doubt, it was hard say goodbye to my friends; but we know we're only a few states away, if need be (and need be). This is just so incredibly different. This place in which I called my home, for almost 9 months. This town, in which I'm still discovering, these people, the culture, the food, the wine (of course), the light, the architecture. Aix. Aix ma ville. And it's time. I have to say good bye, without knowing the next time I'll be returning. I have to say good bye to my friends here, knowing, that to see them will be so much harder than to see my friends in the states. I have to say good bye to this way of life. There's a reason people choose to study here. I have to say good bye to this amazing French family, which have been oh so warm and welcoming (and very patient). I have to say goodbye to my IAU family.

Make no mistake. I miss my family and friends in the states, and would do anything to be with my nieces and nephews right now, even for just a few short hours. Maybe have a meal with spice, like tacos. But honestly, it's still not Aix.

I'm not ready. Sure. I have days or maybe even weeks that I just wanted to be home. Everything seemed it would be better, or at least easier at home. But, would it really. Now that there's only so many days left, I feel like I have to make up for all the time I was stressing and wishing I was home. I wish there were a way to go back and tell myself, “it's not worth it, enjoy the present. Enjoy the people around you. Enjoy this city.” But, Wishing won't do me much good at this point. No. at this point, I can just make the most of the days I have left here. I can love my friends like we don't actually see each other everyday. I can lose myself in the city by taking the one street I never take. I can people watch in my favorite cafe (*cough* Mana). I can take one final marcher to Marchutz, and spend the day there, just so I can take in the beauty it has as the light changes throughout the day. I've never been good at goodbyes, probably never will be; having to say goodbye to a place that has such an imprint on me, feels.. well I don't know. It's this bittersweet pain. My mind is worrying about the short time I have left, whilst my heart is saying “just stay.”

I don't know what to do. Every time I walk into a store/place of some sort all I think is “this is my last time here..” It's, it's almost disheartening. With tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat I stumble through the “merci, au revoir” as I take one last look around.

I feel like I have roots here. My foot is in the door. I'll be back.  

View from my bedroom window. <3

First Impressions!

Here I am, living the dream! It's been a week since I've arrived, and I just fall more and more for this city and the people every single day! I am truly, truly overjoyed with the family that was chosen for me. Corinne (maman) is seriously, the best! She is so sweet and just so motherly! Like, it's so hard to explain, without wanting to using loving and affectionate, but that appears to be the only way. She has two children: Solal (15) and Esther (9). They are awesome! This whole family is awesome and I honestly feel like I lucked out!

My flights were alright. As I briefly mentioned in my last post, I had an 8 hour layover in Minneapolis. So that was cool. Then it was about an 8 hour flight. That was interesting. The girl i sat by slept for a lot of the time, honestly, I would've too, except for the fact that my bladder was about to explode. Literally, the minute she woke up, my seatbelt was off and I was crawling around her. It would've been embarrassing to pee my pants and have that many witnesses. Also, because I'm 20. Alright, so when I arrived, I was to be greeted by maman, Esther, and someone from IAU. However, that didn't happen quite like I thought it would. I got of the plane, and got my suitcase, and there was still no sign of them. Obviously, not having set up a phone plan yet, I was unable to get a hold of anyone, except via email (thank you wifi).  So I emailed both Corinne and Margaux (the housing director for IAU) and told them the situation. A nice old man at a food station in the "hall" I was in noticed I was still there and tried helping me. Unfortunately, it was just broken French for both of us, as that was the only language we had in common. Then as I headed out, trying to comprehend his directions, I got a call from a French number. All I could do was hope it was good news. And it was! It was Margaux! Her and Corinne were at the airport,  just in a different hall. (Apparently, my flight details got placed with all the people arriving from Munich) Pas-grave! Honestly, that was about the only time I thought I was going to cry. I didn't, I held it together! So, Margaux came and got me, and immediately I was greeted with kisses and hugs! Then we chatted a little as we walked over to "Hall 4" (I was in Hall 1), as soon as we walked in my host mom and host sister greeted me with hugs and kisses as well! My host sister even made a sign for me (she's a wonderful artist). I felt so at home! Immediately, there was just, like, I don't know, a peace of mind that hit me. It crazy how wild our imaginations can run when we just know bits and pieces of people. I knew I would get an amazing family, just never thought I'd be blessed with such phenomenal people. Every single day I'm just greeted and filled with love by them! The very first thing my host mom did with me was take me to IKEA. We spent almost 2 hours at IKEA. As tired as I was, I probably could've spent like five more hours there, just exploring and planning my future home. :) Then we headed for Aix. It's about a 20-30 minute drive from Marseille to Aix, but it was beautiful! We got into Aix, and we drove around, my maman was showing different buildings and streets and such, in all honesty, I didn't remember. Then we got home! So we live on the eighth floor of the apartment building. 86 stairs. My suitcase weighed 48 pounds. It's alright now! I actually thoroughly enjoy taking the stairs, and walking everywhere is not a problem what so ever! But that first day I honestly would've just laid down and slept in the entry way of the building. I did make it up, my maman helped me with my bags and then she showed me around, gave me the rules, and then let me get settled. That night, we were to go to her friends house for a little get together. So I decided to just take a quick 30 minute nap and then get ready and unpack some more. Well, I slept through that alarm, and ended up waking up two hours later (6 pm). Pas-grave!  We didn't have to be at Marie's until 8. (Side note: dinners here usually don't even start until about 8 pm or so and they can last for a couple hours!) The night was great, we went to Marie's and now I know more French people, they are kind and wonderful people! Again, I was greeted with hugs and kisses! I love this place! This little get together was cut short (at about midnight or so), on account that I was falling asleep. I felt horrible for doing that, but I could not fight it anymore! So, we checked out Marie's cave. Oh, I should mention that Marie lives in an old Museum, and most houses here have caves! It's beautiful! So we got home and I ended up sleeping for 12 hours! Whoops.

I might also mention, that every time maman would introduced me to someone new, when she'd say my last name, everybody would start laughing. Skoog. It is kind of funny sounding, I guess. Regardless, everyone is seriously so kind. So Sunday, maman took me out on the town to sort of help me be able to find my way by myself! (She works, so she wouldn't be able to show me to class my first day) We met up with Marie and Daniel (from the party) and we checked out Daniel's place. Daniel is a ceramist, he's renovating his apartment so that he lives upstairs, and his workshop is in the cave. Also, Daniel's cave has a cave. C'est incroyable! Then we took a look at the cathedral! Gorgeous! Then we just meandered and we stopped somewhere for drinks and lunch. I got "un cafe" just a shot of espresso, and for food "croque monsieur." Let me explain "croque monsieur" because if you ever try it, it will rock your world, as much, if not more than it rocked mine. So, basically it's a grilled ham and cheese, but with good cheese, because this is France after all. It's put on a panini grill and has beautiful marks, then after that's all nice and melty, there's even more cheese added on top, and then it's broiled or something until that's melty, but crunchy! It's beautiful! Grilled cheese will never be the same for me.

The rest of the week was the "early start program" classes in the morning and scheduled group activities in the afternoons. Honestly, the first like three or four days, I would show up late because I was super awesome at getting lost, I even had a map, and like 3 different people helping me every time. Any who, so the classes were French classes, just to refresh our memories and such, then some of the group activities were: wine tasting/checking out a vineyard, hiking Mount St. Victoire, picnic, checking out Picasso's chateau. Ya know, ordinary things. :) This is the week that classes actually start. Not bad, I mean, as fun as it is being in the south of France, I am here for school, and school is school, after all.... Should be fun though! The school is taking us to La Ciotat on Tuesday (it's a coastal city), then this weekend, they're taking us to a resort in the Alps! I'm not complaining! It really is still incredible to me that this is my life! Like how did I score such a deal! I'll be chatting with friends over tea or something and remember "oh yeah, I'm in France right now." It's so unfathomable that this is actually happening! I can't even begin to explain my emotions for that thought/realization!

I honestly don't know how often I'll actually be updating this, but I'll try and do at least every couple weeks, if not once a month. You guys are awesome! I do miss you! And Montana. As awesome as this is, Montana IS my home!

Bissoux!
Linnea

Leavin' On A Jet Plane!!

As some of you may know, I'm leaving on a jet plane! I applied to and have been accepted to the Institute of American Universities College in Aix-en-Provence, France! I'm planning on being away for a year, but as we all know, sometimes our plans don't always work out. So, yeah! I left this morning (January 15) at 6am and will be in Marseille by 12:30 in the afternoon tomorrow!! It's so crazy! There's a chance, this is probably one of the ways y'all can keep up with me.

The doors that have opened up for me have been AMAZING! My eyes have been opened to so many things, and I couldn't be happier. People are always saying these are the best years of my life! Homework aside, I couldn't agree more! The friends I've made, the people I meet, the teachers who've inspired, and the family who's still there loving me, even at my worst (which honestly, have you seen me?!). Seriously, though, it's amazing that I'm in college. There was always this part of me that wanted to go to college, but there was apart of me that knew I didn't necessarily "need" to go. There are plenty of successful people who never went to college! So I applied to and got accepted to several schools. As graduation rapidly approached, I decided to "go" to the college that was as far away from my family as possible, Cairn University in Langhorne, PA (a bit outside of Philly). I thought that I would be ok being that far way from my family and that I needed a break form them anyway. At the time I was comfortable in my choice. Sure, it was a private Uni, and mega expensive, but I had a scholarship, no big. So, senior year ended and I graduated third in my class (of 25)... haha. The day after graduation I was on a 6 am flight to Germany to witness my brothers nuptials. (Germany was awesome and the wedding was beautiful!) Side note: I had been taking French classes since 7th grade and Cairn didn't have any sort of foreign language classes. Ok, so when I'm in Germany, I end up using my French a whole lot more than I ever thought I would. So I had this grand scheme to just not go to school at all and just do a work study thing throughout Europe or nanny! It was great, until I let my parents know. They weren't as cool about it. So after letting them stew in it for quite a few weeks, I finally told them that I would not be attending Cairn because I wanted to continue my French and there was just no possible way for me to do that there. So all my parents said to that was, "fine, but you're going to go somewhere else for at least one year." So, fine, I decided to make them happy, and just go somewhere for a year. Because of my oh so timely manner, I didn't apply to MSU until 2 weeks before classes started. I had, however, been accepted at UM already, so I decided to proceed there, just not holding my breath about the MSU app or really honestly anything at UM working out. It did, obviously. Things moved forward at both schools. I obviously ended up in Bozeman. At the time it was because there was a possibility of no room in the dorms, and I have immediate family here I could live with. I do believe God definitely has a greater plan for why I am in Bozeman and I may or may not be figuring it out! Also, I just love Bozeman and the area so so much! (Camp is uber close!!) So, that's how I ended up here! There were so many people praying for me and I just couldn't be more blessed.

Needless to say, my parents were right (cringe noise) I ended up liking college and am halfway through my sophomore year (halfway done, with halfway being done). My declared major is French Education/Teaching, which means I am planning on becoming one of those crazy foreign language teachers! (Thank you Madame!) Since I am going to be teaching French, it's wise to be as knowledgable as possible. My French advisor informed me that I would "have to" spend at least a year in France to get the "complete" experience (or something like that), I was just like "yeah! sign me up!!"

That brings us to now! About a month ago, my dad and I went to San Fransisco so I could apply for my visa! Like I said, I've started my trip, and am now enduring an 8 hour layover in Minneapolis. (I suppose it could be worse) I know this will be a wonderful experience and I will learn so so much, I do have some restraints though. 1. leaving my family for this long. I don't just mean my parents, whatever, I mean my nieces and nephews. Those little bundles of joy are my world and I cannot even begin to express how much I am going to miss them! 2. Friends: there's so many things we have yet to do, but so little time! I know that we'll meet up again, and whatever, but it's just the over thinker inside me that says "what if something happens" or "but I never told them this/that" here it is: I love you all! Seriously, you all play such an important role in my life, that literally only you could fill! 3. I'll miss my dogs. Seriously, my lab knew I was leaving and was so noticeably sad when i was saying good bye to him (honestly, that was the only goodbye I got teary over)Who wouldn't miss their k-9s? 4. Templed Hills. Just, do I need to say more? 5. Again, the "over thinker" all the "what-ifs" "what if I just would have called..." "what if I just would have told him how I feel" "what if I wait one more semester to study abroad" 6. getting over the fact that life still goes on. My family will still have events that I just won't be apart of. I am going to have to get over it. 7. The fact that I want life to start. Like a husband, family, career. but it's not happening, yet. All in God's timing.

Any who, so that's a little background of me! I know this one was a bit lengthy, but hey. Hopefully y'all will stay tuned and read about my adventures! I'm so thrilled to have this experience, and I know it will be such an amazing learning experience!

I LOVE you ALL!! And seriously Miss you all already!
Until next time,
<3 Linnea